Breaking the Legacy of Silence #37: Living in and Alongside Love of All Types Part 5 of LGBTQ NB/GF Series | FIVE:2:ONE

So, with all of that said, and life being a bitch sometimes, we must understand that to love another human being is to stand back and give them room to breathe and be who they are, not some manifestation of our expectations of who they should be.

Ah, but here’s the rub. In order for any kind of relationship to work, there must be reciprocity.

I love and accept you…you love and accept me. Simple, right?

Not always, but it’s worth a shot when the reward is immeasurable love and loyalty.

When it comes to loving our LGBTQ NB/GF friends and family, we must look beyond our preconceived notions of who and what they should be, our individual beliefs, and see the person within. That’s who we fight for. That’s who we love.

Breaking the Legacy of Silence: #35 LGBTQ/NB/GF, Marriage and Family Part 3 By Kim D. Bailey | Weekly Column | FIVE:2:ONE

“Sexuality and orientation are not something we can necessarily define clearly or put in a box. Although the most pervasive idea of a “couple” is a man and a woman, most likely married, and who usually have children if they are able. In society, a couple is also part of procreation. It is a moral imperative and social responsibility.”
Kim D Bailey returns with her 3rd out of 5 columns about LGBTQ family.

Breaking the Legacy of Silence #34 For Parents, Family, and Friends of LGBTQ/Non-binary/Gender Fluid Individuals: Part 2 How to Effectively Support Your Loved One When They Are Facing Community Social, Political, Economical, and Religious Biases | Column | Kim D. Bailey | FIVE:2:ONE

“It’s in our relationship to God, Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Adonai, The Holy Spirit, Wisdom, Great Spirit, Mother Creation, or a Higher Power. Some agnostics or atheists may have their own views and names. That’s okay. The point is, it’s the relationship with such a power, others, and ourselves that bears out our legacy. If our relationships aren’t healthy, nothing else can be. So, we must start there. Whether it’s in church, synagogue, temple, a mosque, a sweat lodge, a vision quest, or meditation—we reach others by reaching the essence of our being. That essence is love. Even in the Christian Bible, the Torah, the Quran—all Word comes down to the relationships we have, not self-righteousness.”

Kim D Bailey talks more about parents and the LGBTQ community in the second part of her 5 part series.

Breaking the Legacy Of Silence # 33 For Parents, Family, and Friends of LGBTQ, Non-Binary/Gender Fluid Individuals, Part 1: When Your Child Comes Out to You as Transgender | FIVE:2:ONE

Breaking the Legacy of Silence # 32 Happy Birthday Noah | Kim D. Bailey | Five 2 One Magazine 

“My oldest child, Zach, had also been born as a girl to me. We named her Amanda Margaret Renee Lee. When “Mandi” was 10 she told me she was gay. I was okay, a little shaken up but really okay. Ten years later she told me she was going to start the process to transgender, female to male, and came to me first because, “I know you will be the most understanding and I need your support when I tell everyone else.” ‘

Kim D Bailey celebrates her son’s 21st today on #BTLOS

Breaking the Legacy of Silence #27 Love is Love | Kim D. Bailey – FIVE:2:ONE

“One of the last to be taken in 2016 was George Michael, the 80’s pop star who originally wowed girls my age with his band Wham!, with such songs as “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go,” “Everything She Wants,” and “Freedom,” all songs released in 1984 when I was in my last year of high school. Yeah, I bought the vinyl, because even though we had CD technology, vinyl was still affordable for a teenage girl like me. Besides, I grew up on those discs of delicious glory.”

This week on #breakingthelegacy Kim D Bailey talks about love and 2016.

Sunday Songs: To Start Off 2017 On A Beautiful Note | New Year’s Day by Mary Chapin Carpenter | Dwelling In Possibilities 

It’s one of those checkpoints of life: New Year’s Day. 

Sometimes we make resolutions, aspiring to make goals out of dreams. 

Other times, we swear off such lofty notions and go to our curmudgeonly corners, scoffing at others while we secretly wish we had hope.
I struggle between the two and, in the past, depending on how my life has gone thus far, I waver between hope and hopelessness. 

2016 was not my most stellar moment in regards to my personal life, relationships with some people I desperately tried to hold on to, or in my ability to make money. 

I’ve also grieved the election results, going through all but the last of the five stages–acceptance. I’ve settled somewhere between Resist and Rest, and have made it my goal to speak to the truth whether anyone likes it or not. I won’t win any popularity contests…but when have I ever sought to be loved by the masses? The answer to that is: NEVER. There are a few I still yearn to be loved by, but I continue to wait and hope.

However, 2016 began on January 1st with my first publication, a featured short story and a poem, in Firefly Magazine

I was given the gift of a weekly column by Breaking the Legacy of Silence by Kim D. Bailey at Five 2 One Magazine in June. I’ve been published in several online journals and two print journals, and I was nominated for the Pushcart Prize by my amazing friends, family, and other writers when I was shortlisted by The Scarlet Leaf Review September 2016, with my nonfiction piece about confronting the man who molested me when I was 11-years-old, “I Took It Back.” 

Firefly completed my astounding first year of publication by accepting a sequel to the short story from Issue 3 (above), in Issue 8, and closing out a successful year.

Other good things happened. 

I met some exceptional people and formed beautiful relationships with a few. 

I attended my first writerly conference in September, where one of my more fruitful relationships blossomed into a familial bond when S.C. McCole and I attended Jeff Goins’s Tribe Conference. He has become like a brother to me, and is the founder of Moby’s Mob

I learned to love myself. As my other dear friend and fellow writer told me, “Look in the mirror, every day, and say, ‘I love you.'” James Stack. This waxed Al Franken from Saturday Night Live, but I tried it. It works!

Finally, I came out. After 50 years I admitted to myself, and the world, that I am attracted to women. Some of the younger generation out there don’t see coming out as a necessity, but for an old lesbian like me, it was a pivotal moment.   It was a step I needed to definitively take in the demarcation of my life, the before and after (Look for my first column of the year with Five 2 One Magazine, on January 7th, where I shall expound further on the business of coming out and the prejudices the LGBTQ community still face.)

For now, I hope you’ll enjoy this song from Mary Chapin Carpenter’s album, Ashes and Roses. 

Listen to the words. Her story of how the song was created is especially important. 

“I dwell in possibilities/on New Year’s Day…”

New Year’s Day by Mary Chapin Carpenter

Breaking the Legacy of Silence #24 When Hope Must Be Your Armor | Kim D. Bailey | Five 2 One Magazine 

His inaction and unwillingness to make me a priority and to stand up for me when I was being attacked or hurt by those people drove a wedge between us.

Kim D. Bailey is back with #breakingthelegacyofsilence:

Breaking the Legacy of Silence #23 Be Brave Enough to Speak Up, and Kind Enough to Listen | Kim D. Bailey Five 2 One Magazine 

Part of my mission has been to speak up against injustices, to tell stories about my truths, and to show how I have overcome the obstacles in my life to arrive at my most authentic state of being. It’s always a work in progress.

Change is part of perpetual growth. And such growth is necessary to mature and become insightful, not only regarding our own thoughts and feelings, but in understanding others.